Hello my friend!

I’m sure you are already in full swing around all the Christmas preparations and there are a million things you need to do before you can relax into a calm serene Christmas eve.

For me the time before Christmas tends to become very stressful and the momentum of all the things that need to be done take a tool on my relationships to self and my closest ones.

I’m sure you can relate 😊

On top of that, we very often forget what it all really is about.

For me, Christmas is about coming together as a family or a group of close friends, making some stronger connections, and getting to know each other even deeper.

For me it is a celebration of love and connection.

But don’t we usually end up tired and stressed out and totally overwhelmed by each other’s expectations?

Imagine how it would feel like if you could simply shake off all these expectations and just get to know each other a little bit better.

That’s why I created an engaging family game that we are going to play right after our Christmas dinner on Christmas eve.

And I invite you to do the same.

Instead of watching some soapy Christmas movies (which is all OK with me, of course…we all do it 😉) you can create your own magic story evening by diving deep into the game.

I call it The FIVE spirits of Christmas.

Why FIVE?

Because we will explore FIVE aspects of our past year and share our stories with each other as a family.

It’s the perfect gift for the whole family!

Let me show you why.

This game is especially created for the core family setting, so mainly for parents with their kids, although if you think that you would love to play it with grandparents included, go for it. You can also play it with a group of close friends, as a couple or with your ever young parents.

As long as there is a connection between you and someone you really care about, the game is of great value.

Before you decide who you are going to play the game with, have a closer look at the it.

Be fully present and leave your smartphone and all other electronic device in another room.

Also, switch off your TV.

You can put on some stimulating music though.

Take a pile of post it notes, one colour for each family member and a few pens.

This game is especially created for families with children from the age of about 7 years and older. It's the most benefical for families with teenagers.

It is created in a spirit of curiosity and exploration, NOT evaluation and judgment.

LEAVE ALL THE EVALUATION AND JUDGMENT OUT OF THE GAME!

It is all about teaching our children how to create self-explorative and self-reflective skills and especially sharing their inner experiences uncensored with us parents.

Our job as parents is, that we create and hold a totally safe space for our children to share their experiences and DON’T take anything personally, even if there are some answers that we are not happy about, because it’s showing us some blind sports of our own parenting!

It’s not about pointing with the finger, it is all about having safe sincere and compassionate conversations with our children, giving them tools to better know themselves and you as human beings. Don’t be a parent in this game, be an equal participant and let them know that you play the game as an equal part of the family.

It is all about creating and opening new ways of communicating with our children, especially when we fell into a routine of superficial conversations. No judgment here, it happens to all of us!

With all compassion, give yourself and your children a lot of grace and bring a lot of HUMOR into the game!

Ask the following questions and each family member needs to make the best effort she/he can, to answer all questions as sincere as possible. Write all of the answers on post it notes and at the end you read all of the answers together.

QUESTION #1

What are the 10 (or more) EXPERIENCES / ACCOMPLISHMENTS in your last year THAT YOU ARE ESPECIALLY PROUD OF? Try to find at least 10 things, the more the better.

QUESTION #2

What are the 10 (or more) SITUATIONS / EXPERIENCES YOU WERE THE MOST CHALLENGED BY IN THE LAST YEAR AND WHAT DID YOU DO ABOUT IT?

QUESTION #3

What are the 10 (or more) SITUATIONS YOU WISH YOU WOULD HANDLE DIFFERENTLY, WHAT DID YOU DO AND WHAT WOULD YOU DO DIFFERENTLY NOW?

QUESTION #4

What are the 10 (or more) SITUATIONS/GESTURES THAT MADE YOU DEEPLY CONNECTED TO EACH FAMILY MEMBER IN THE LAST YEAR?

QUESTION #5

What are THE 10 (or more) CHARACTERISTICS YOU ESPECIALLY VALUE, CHERISH OR APPRECIATE ON THE OTHER.

Now that you have answered all of the questions, reflect on all of the answers and agree on ways on HOW YOU COULD IMPROVE SOME OF THE CHALLENGING THINGS YOU UNCOVERED, with all family members being EQUALLY INVOLVED.

EXTRA QUESTION:

What are your suggested solutions, processes or ways you could add to IMPROVE THE SITUATION?

Now reflect on these answers and agree on some CONSTRUCTIVE WAYS to IMPROVE the challenge in your family.

WRITE THE AGREED UPON SOLUTIONS ON A BIGGER PIECE OF PAPER and put it on a VISIBLE PLACE in your home, so that everyone can see it every day.

You can even make a whole piece of art out of it, get creative and maybe you would like to frame it for the coming year as a remainder of your agreement!

Stick to your agreements and watch the magic happen!

I wish you a Merry Christmas and a beautiful start of an unlimited magical New Year!

We all deserve some magic, love and joy in our lives!

And we all have the power to create it, first within ourselves, then within our families and circles of friends!